Ever go see a movie and think to yourself, "man that's 2 hours of my life I wish I could get back."? Well that about sums up my thoughts on this terribleness that I sat through. (and yes... I did just say terribleness.) I guess it should be my own fault for expecting anything much after seeing the first 'Crank'. I guess I hoped that Jason Statham would get sick and tired of playing the exact same role in every single movie he has ever acted in. Honestly, is the Chev from this any different from the Frank in 'The Transporter' films? Or Handsome Rob from the 'Job' movies? Or who the heck ever he was in 'Death Race'? I mean how many times can one actor play the exact same guy across a barrage of different films before we get tired of it? (Please refrain from throwing Sly Stallone out there at me. I could watch 'Rambo' and 'Rocky' flicks all day long!! lol)So back to the original terribleness... I don't think there was a 5 minute period that I enjoyed what I was watching. The action was decent, but mostly ridiculously over the top. The random manners in which he tried to keep his "heart pumping" I guess we would say were just plain ridiculous. The soft core porn scenes along with the stops by Asian brothels and strip clubs were just stupid attempts at getting some boobs on the screen. Now, I am not necessarily against on screen boobs... but there has to be a reason. And enough is enough. This movie had more random sex and boobs than gun fights. Am I watching Cinemax late at night or am I watching a box office action movie??? I can't tell.
I don't really have much to say about this one. I thought it was pretty terrible all the way around. It is now to the point that if Jason Statham is the leading man, I am in NO rush to see it. He is much more easily tolerated as Handsome Rob or Turkish ('Snatch'). Heck, i can even tolerate him better as video game voices. This was terrible. I'd say 3 out of 10.
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